[i never thought we'd end up here in separate cages]

I feel on the cusp of something.

On the edge.

Something is approaching.

Or ending.

I feel a sense of excitement and melancholy all at once.

I was explaining this to my best friend/roommate (she's the greatest), and I was telling her that I couldn't figure it out, I couldn't find a way to explain what I was feeling, or why I sensed this change in the air. To my surprise, or maybe not so much to my surprise, she had a brilliant thought. Maybe...we are leaving Limbo.

Limbo.

I have been in Limbo since May 27, 2007. St. Olaf graduation. I definitely did not feel ready for that day, I loved college, and the ending of school meant the end of my easily structured life (which I am not whining about, don't get me wrong). I did not like the sudden gift of power over my own life - I did not see it as a gift at all. I felt behind, like I'd forgotten to get ready...and in truth, I had forgotten. I was not prepared. I went home to live with my parents, and in retrospect, I'm glad I did. But I entered Limbo that day. And I do believe I've lingered in that state of being since then; however, perhaps the end is in sight. It's funny...I think I've gotten comfortable in this land of Limbo. Even though I've wanted to get out of Limbo and feel more in control of my life, I have gotten used to the excuse. And what comes next? I mean, I certainly won't know all of the answers...and I don't expect to, I mean, that's ridiculous. I have no idea what comes after Limbo, I only know there has to be something...and maybe that Something is the change in the air.

We shall see, I suppose.

[amanda]

Ingrid Michaelson, "Let Go," Slow the Rain

[photos taken by yours truly in Prospect Park, 3.17.11]